We Always Speak The Language of Colonisers

by Sher Ting

Hinomaru. What’s mine is yours.
All this earth and the blood raised on it.
Kimigayo. How language became
a man with a trigger. And when I spoke
about grief, there was another warm body
to pull from the dead. When we pronounced
Kako (the past), we took only the letters
from our history. The o to mark the point
of separation, the object removed from its place.
I was a set of particles forced into
dissimilar syntax, orbiting a gravitas
of moras, wondering if hate was a language
or if we had written a language into hate.
The classrooms etched with 尊敬
but we’d long stopped calling things what they are.
The old tonalities effaced
as an escarpment in the dark.
I speak little in the columbariums of former lovers.
The jarring pain that geminates from
anything even the absence of song.
The warring echo, a diminishing cry
till the walls have smothered its voice.
I write about bushido
how the Japanese word for 静 (silence)
sounds too much like 净 (clean)
When the planes have drowned the screams
of the birds, I write misogi watching
the rain beat a city out of its eye.
I know only of how we have bled
from one defeat to the next—
silence
the only violence that is immortal—
and I’m only terrified of the unknown,
like a hand reaching from the dark,
not knowing
what it’ll find next.

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